language of song

the breath and memory of song
were starting to go
language of song
silent after all these years
no other time
when she didn't sing

only air now

sharing a pillow just to hear
her breath
only air now

no more songs

words so rare

the air had been full of songs
upon our rising
we knew the world
was still turning
happy, sad, scared  song  song  song
the thread of our youth

radio blaring
washer singing
bread rising
floors shining
soup sizzling
cold nights
summer heat
songs just filled our ears

the last song

"Show me the way to go home
I'm tired and I want to go to bed
had a little drink about an hour ago
and it went right to my head"

the verse came so easily complete with
theatrical hiccups
midnight
shared bed
hysterical laughter
the last song
she sang to me

"you have to laugh when you can" she said

water for tears

where does the water for tears
come from?
torn from cells and forced out
through the eye
no wonder crying hurts so much

when will this end
when will this end
please
not yet

be ok for just another moment
laugh and sing to me
pick some flowers
breath in the morning
infect me with your love of living
hold me close
take me with you
to the land of no pain
the land of I am your daughter
and you are my mom

this place hurts too much
I will split in half
I will explode
the pain of grief will take me under
doubled over in the kitchen, tears
salty tears, will I ever stand straight again?
to face that vision
of bones, to release my hold
on this fragment
what remains of you

so soft the whisper

so soft the whisper
a breath
a sigh
patterns in the sand
a warm breath
blue sky
blue mountains of sea
silver sigh
sand
whispers in wind
drifting breath
mountains of sky
wistful breath
mountains of sighs
silver clouds
come home,
come home
so soft the whisper

I am that form of a seer

in the midst of migraines I have

often experienced states of 

euphoria

in my worst pain I have

experienced profound joy

in such a paradox one day I

thought

"I know nothing,

I don't get it, 

I know absolutely nothing"

And then I heard a chorus of voices

sounding not unkind and rather joyous

saying

"now she sees"

We live in a world of pain and of joy

I am amazed by the transcendence of the human 

spirit and dismayed by the 

violence of our evolution.

We seem to live in a world of 

both heaven and hell.

Yin and Yang

motion and stillness

opposites that are a part of each 

other

I don't get it

I no longer expect to

but it is fun to try

I am that form of a seer

no going back

thunder rolls - lightning has already struck - we are put on alert

the recording has happened

memory occurs



now the sound, the sight, is present

it lingers until the next distraction

the next sight, sound, smell, of something new or old

brings us elsewhere and back



again
and
again



roll with the punches
go with the flow
work with the energy that comes

become this, that, the other ...


maintain

let go

gather



mindfulness
openness
stillness
motion

the same
yet different




I saw three deer this evening

it was a sign for me